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It is currently half past nine, and I am nowhere near sleepy so it is only natural that my thoughts begin to wander.
I think about my not-so-productive holiday, I think about my upcoming Korean lessons, and I think about my senior high school that I visited today. Oh how I miss walking past the falling leave, looking up at those trees, and laughing alongside my friends.
How I have missed the smell of humid, chilly, early in the morning air, and the chirping sound of the birds, and the warm, familiar atmosphere that I am so used to for three years.
I walk around that place now, not much older, but so much wiser -and I found myself smiling in the middle of it all.
High school is the most beautiful moment in life, they say, and I'd never thought I'd agree. But alas, I see the beauty I failed to notice back then.
It is in the struggles, in the awkward moments, and in the stupid choices I made. Each and every one of them is beautiful, for they have carved themselves a place in these memories I hold dear.
I no longer resent having to run to class, afraid of being late to my next class. I no longer resent those difficult math tests. I don't even remember why I hated being there anymore. I have finally seen it in its true light, yet I am somewhat half a year late, and I wish I could've cherished those moments sooner.
I used to think,
"Let's just finish this quick and get out of here."
And now I think,
"I'd do anything to be back here."
I used to push myself so hard, and tell myself that someday, I'll see the light at the end of the tunnel. That I just had to endure a little more, and it will all be worth it.
Why did I think like that?
Now that I'm almost 19, I'm going to tell myself,
"I know you feel like you haven't reached that point, that point we promised we'll get to one day. I know you might not be as happy as you thought you'd be,
but everyone can choose happiness, and so can you.
The most beautiful moment in life isn't when you've achieved everything you've ever wanted in life, it is when you're old enough to just stop -look back, and be grateful for the life you have been blessed with."
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