Image: Robin Schreiner from Unsplash
The only constant thing in life is change, they say.
Then why do I still feel restless now that I'm about to face one?
Haven't I gone through a heck of a lot of preparations to tackle this so-called dinamika?
Haven't I known from day one that this would never be a permanent arrangement?
Haven't I literally survived worse in life?
It still amazes me how we could look back to things we've been through and think that damn that was a tough one, how did I even manage to survive that?
But at the same time, when the matter is right in front of you it seems so huge and scary, and it feels like you wouldn't be able to solve it no matter how hard you try.
How does one do life anyway?
It's not like it came with a manual book.
I once thought that nothing in this world could even surprise me anymore. But the world, as we know it, seems to have a knack for making a fool out of me, proving yet again that even with 25 years' worth of knowledge there are still many things I don't know how to deal with.
It's upsetting, I must admit.
I thought that maybe with age and life's crazy twists and turns along the way, there would be one point in my life when I have everything all figured out. I love having every little thing planned and figured out. (Yes that's very INTJ of me, I'm aware)
But all of these surprises thrown at me make me feel like every day I'm only straying further from God, no just kidding, from the former point, of course.
Sigh.
Why does life not come with hints and cheats like games do?
But, you know...
As long as I still get to do what I love to do - everything will be alright, right?
I have worked so hard to get to where I am now. Moreover, I have finally found someone to look up to in this field. It's only been a while since I thought to myself 'Hey, I think I almost got this'.
It would be such a shame to let one hurdle erase all of these progresses I've made. I don't know what's in store for me on this path, but I still want to see it through to the end.
As the wise quote I put on my lock screen goes, "I'm so proud of you for trying your best every day, regardless of what that may look like."
Remember why we started this journey in the first place.
Remember the clueless, 20-year-old Innaz saying proudly, "Yeah, I want to make good products".
We got this!
